FlightAware Discussions

Some aviation humor

We could use some smiles right about now, hopefully this will make a few smiles, especially those who love aviation…!

God does not subtract from man’s allotted time the hours spent while flying, but He exacts harsh penalties for those who do not learn to land properly.

Mommy, I want to grow up and be a pilot. Honey, you can’t do both.

When you see a tree in the clouds, it’s not good news.

Heaven is crowded with civilian pilots who did not get their Instrument Rating.

Aviation’s greatest invention was the relief tube.

I’m at the age when I realize the best thing about flying fighters was free oxygen.

Takeoffs are optional, landings are mandatory.

Never fly the “A” model of anything.

Pilots - looking down on people since 1903.

There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing. Unfortunately, no pilot knows exactly what they are.

The average fighter pilot despite a swaggering personality and confident exterior is capable of feelings such as love, affection, humility, caring and intimacy. They just don’t involve others.

Pilot dictum: remember, in the end, gravity always wins.

You can only tie the record for flying low.

Newton’s Law: What goes up must come down. Squadron Commander’s Law: What comes down better be able to go up again!

Beer was invented to make pilot stories more interesting

Death is God’s way of telling pilots to watch their airspeed on final.

You can’t fly unless you can land, but you can’t land unless you can fly. So, which is it?

FAA motto for pilots: “We’re not happy unless you’re not happy.”