Needed: Farsi to English Translator

I always get a chuckle out of things that are translated from one language to another when the translation is done literally. The following is from the IranAir web site.

During Flight Guidelines

-If you are traveling with your family or with a group and wish to be beside the other members of your group, attend at the airport before the appointed time, then the airport staffs could provide you more facilities.
-During the flight keep the safety belts closed as far as possible.
-At the time of landing and before the complete stop and opening of the doors, do not leave your seat because it’s probable that due to sudden brake you loose your balance.
-When quitting the plane, consider not to leave any personal items in the cabin. In case that you leave something, immediately inform IranAir Lost and Found section located at the airport.
-In international flights before landing at the destination airport and in order to facilitate the custom formalities and passports some cards are given to you. You should write your identification characteristics on them.
-Keep your vaccination card and passport always with you and it is advised to keep some more personnel photos and a copy of your passport and your other papers in another place. In case that you loose your passport you could refer to the nearest embassy of Iran and get a permanent passing card. Also, write down the date in which the ticket is issued and it’s number then in case of lost you could follow the matter at once.
-If you get off the plane on the connection stations, come back on time.
-In international flights, if you plan to stay more than three days in your destination, your return seat which has been booked from the origin should be approved by IranAir offices again. Failing to confirm your seat results in booked seat cancellation.

Well, there are some grammatical errors there, but not too hard to understand.

I get an even bigger kick out of Chinese-to-English translation signs (chinglish). Here are a few good sites:
dailymail.co.uk/news/article … ation.html
squidoo.com/funnychinesesigns
lichao.net/eblog/funny-english-t … 05140.html